When Ashlee Ostler joined Rowland Hall’s Athletics Department as an Upper School girls basketball assistant coach in 2012, she had no idea she was embarking on a nearly decade-long journey. Through marriage, the birth of four children, and the earliest years of her professional journey, Rowland Hall girls basketball was a constant in Ashlee’s life.

This, of course, made Ashlee’s decision to move on after the 2021–2022 season bittersweet indeed.

Ashlee has been such a great role model and mentor for our girls basketball athletes for many years. She has contributed much to our girls basketball program and has touched many young lives over the years, helping teach them more than just the skills and strategy of basketball. She will be greatly missed.—Kendra Tomsic, director of athletics

“I am still kind of in denial that it is really done,” she said.

And though her coaching days at Rowland Hall are done for the moment, it’s clear that Ashlee’s influence on the program will live on. Upper School girls basketball head coach Bill Tatomer, who hired Ashlee in the fall of 2012, remembers how the young coach immediately connected with the athletes and how she naturally harnessed her love of basketball and her own years as a player to challenge and encourage students—a skill she continued to hone during her years at the school.

“Ash had such a laidback and loving persona that resonated so well with the girls,” said Bill. “She loved to mix it up with the girls on the court and push them to get better, but she understood when to challenge a player and also when to just watch—and, best of all, when to listen. I've always lived by the creed that coaching basketball isn't about the wins and losses but about relationships: how do you make your players feel about the game, about their team, and about themselves? Ash did a great job championing this philosophy and I couldn't be prouder or more thankful for all she gave to the girls and the program over the past decade.”

It’s a sentiment echoed by players as well. “Ashlee has impacted my life in so many ways and I couldn't thank her enough,” said senior Micha Nenbee. “She knew how to make practice fun while also teaching us the basics of basketball. She has also taught me to see the positive in everything and to not give up. It has been great having Ashlee not only as a coach but a friend in my life.”

We asked Ashlee to reflect on her time at Rowland Hall and shared her answers below. Responses have been lightly edited for length and clarity.

Briefly share your background as a player and coach, and how you came to coach at Rowland Hall.

Growing up (and still to this day) my dad was a coach of everything, but specifically varsity boys and girls basketball. I started playing probably the same time I started walking and spent so many nights from a very young age at the gym during practice and traveling all over to watch them play. We are a basketball family; my four siblings and I played, and three of us went on to play at the junior college level.

I always thought it would be fun to coach because I love the game so much, but I never thought once I moved to Utah that I would have that chance. A former teammate of mine was coaching at Rowland Hall and asked me to come scrimmage against the team because they had such a small group that year, and when I was there she told me that she had to move for school and asked if I would be interested [in her position].

You coached at Rowland Hall for nearly a decade. What kept you at the school?

The coaching staff and the girls. My life always got busier, but I loved Bill and [fellow assistant coach] Stacy [Martin] so much, and it was such an easy place to be. The girls were always the best. Every year I would think, “Maybe it is time for a break,” or I would have a baby and think, “Not this year,” but once you coach a freshman group you think, “Well, I can't leave them so maybe next year.” Every year there is a new group of girls that makes you want to stay until they graduate.

I loved how fun the program was—never too serious. We worked hard, but at the end of the day we were just happy to be playing and learning about basketball.

What is your most treasured memory from your time at Rowland Hall?

It is one of the best feelings to watch something you taught come to life.—Ashlee Ostler

I honestly don't think I could come up with just one. I always dreaded the lock-in because I never got good sleep and I am scared of everything. Bill would take the freshmen on a haunted tour of the school and would make me hide somewhere by myself, and I was always too embarrassed to say I was scared. It always ended up being so fun.

The other thing I would say is when you have been working on something with someone—in my case, a post move—and they suddenly do it in a game and it clicks. It is one of the best feelings to watch something you taught come to life and see how proud they are.

What will you miss most about Rowland Hall?

I'm definitely going to miss the people. My circle at Rowland Hall was small, but it was so great. Everyone I worked with was amazing and cared so much about the program and the players. I am going to miss having those few hours a night to do something I love.

Is there anything you’d like to say to your students and/or fellow coaches?

I would just say thank you, mostly to Bill—he always encouraged me to push myself with my coaching and was such a great mentor. I hope one day down the road my life gets to a point where I can coach again, and I learned so much about basketball and coaching and patience from him. Stacy was amazing and such an inspiration, and thanks to everyone at Rowland Hall for the chance to work in the program with the amazing kids. I am going to miss everyone so much.

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